These Kids

Life has continued happening even though I have not been posting about it. Ramona turned 4! I don't think I took any real pictures of her birthday because I was kind of stressed out at the time. I'm kind of sad about it, but meh, she had a lot of fun. We went to trick-or-treat at the zoo and then had family over. She is excited to be four, and already can't wait to be five.

Halloween was good. They delayed our trick-or-treating due to weather fears (that were pretty much unfounded.) Ramona changed her mind about what to be for Halloween about a million times. She finally settled on a fawn about a week before Halloween. Then she changed her mind the night before Halloween when we were getting ready to go to the store to get supplies to make her costume. I admittedly didn't do the best job on this costume, but she was happy with it, so whatever. Ruby was a Ru-bee. (Hahaha, I am funny.) They both did pretty well walking around (well, Ruby was in the stroller) and Ramona was really good at saying trick-or-treat and thank you this year.

Joe was very unimpressed with my rainbow costume. I guess he'll just make the next conceptual costume our child comes up with the day before Halloween.

Pregnant me, my sister and the kids. Miles was a horse. It was pretty cute.

Life has been really really good lately. The kids are just really fun to be around. Ramona is my little buddy. She's getting into doing crafts, baking, and playing games, so we always have some sort of "project" we are working on together. It's fun to teach her new things. She's learning how to write and draw and is obsessed with spelling. Hanging out with her generally feels like  you're in a constant spelling bee, which does get old sometimes, but, I love that she loves to learn.

Ramona with her worm friend.

Ruby is firmly in toddler mode, which means more than a few tantrums (especially when she's tired) but she also has a big grin and can be pretty charming, which makes up for it most of the time. She's an "I do it myself" kid, which was not the case with Ramona. Sometimes that's really great, others, not so much. I mean, she just is incapable of doing some things, so it gets frustrating for both her and us when she desperately wants to do something and can't and won't let us help. But, such is the life of the toddler. She is starting to talk and has a little list of things she says- mama, daddy (although never when Joe wants her to, much to his annoyance. I don't think he would mind as much if she didn't totally mess with him by responding, "Mama?" every time he asks her to say daddy.) She says yeah and no, bye, ball, bubble, apple, balloon, baby, water, thanks, clap, Ramona, and cat and does a few choice animal noises. She also says, "I did it!" and "Yay!" from a book about using the potty that she is obsessed with. "No!" also started from reading Where's Spot? And "Hop on Pop" is something she says when she jumps on Joe as well as what she calls any Dr. Seuss book.

Ruby loves pizza as much as the rest of us

New baby is doing well (I mean, from what I know.) This baby is not dropping and so I cannot breathe, but other than that, the pregnancy is going well. I'm looking forward to being able to climb around with the kids and play more, but I'm trying to enjoy this pregnancy since it is most likely my last. We finally have names picked and are super excited to find out if we'll be an all girl family or if we'll add a boy to the mix. I've got about five weeks left until my due date. Then we'll have another kid. WEIRD.

I'm looking forward to expanding the family. The more kids, the crazier and busier it gets.This family makes me pretty happy.

We have these moments, when we can't make everyone happy.

And these ones- everyone loves playing "elevator" in our closet.

Mother's Day pIctures

It's been quite a while since I last wrote in here. I blame school. I've been out of school for a few weeks now and am out until near the end of August, so maybe I'll update this a couple times before I get sucked into that black hole again.

Much has happened since last I wrote. I got a promotion to a new job that I like much more than my old job. I am a happy lady with a fuller bank account. I get satisfaction from my job. It's nice.

We also bought a house. We are moving into it next weekend. This weekend, Joe and I are painting pretty much the entire upstairs. That should be fun. Not really, but at least it will be done. My mom is watching the girls while we do it, so at least we won't have the kids getting into the paint.

I also am pregnant. "Again?" you are thinking. Yes, again. This is theoretically our last kid, but knowing how we are, don't rely to heavily on that statement. It's our last planned kid. Not that this kid was planned. But, whatever. We are excited to bring another baby into the mix. I found out I was pregnant around the time we started our house hunting, so we did manage to get a four bedroom.

So, there's a lot going on and many good things. My life is almost too good right now. It's kind of concerning. Like, what horrible thing is going to happen to counteract all this awesomeness? We shall see. I was convinced our new house would be destroyed by a flash flood or tornado before we even moved in, but so far, so good. As for now, we are happy and things are going well.

Third pregnancy is so weird. The first one is kind of remarkable. It's so cool the way your body just changes and does stuff and just somehow knows how to do it. Very impressive, body! The second time, it's kind of a smug rehashing of the first pregnancy. "I know this deal. I'm not a lame first time mom anymore. I'm too cool!" That is the second pregnancy attitude I possessed. Third pregnancy is more like, "I"m pregnant? I forgot again." I don't have time to think about this pregnancy at all. People ask how far I am, and I'm like, "Uh, somewhere between 15 and 17 weeks. I forget which."

We are not finding out if this one is a boy or a girl (until birth, I mean. I'm assuming it will be fairly obvious after the child is born.) I think it will be fun to have a surprise this time. I need something to shake this pregnancy up and shoot some excitement into it. That's another thing about third pregnancy. Everyone seems less excited and is more like, "Oh, you're doing that again." Like it's your unseemly hobby or something. "Ugh, Megan is having ANOTHER baby we have to pretend to care about. I'm so over it."

Anyway, enough about baby number three (who we are very excited about, despite my joking.) I missed blogging about pretty much everything that happened so far this year, so here are some pictures of things we did over the last few months. First, Ramona ran the kids' marathon again this year. She was more excited about it this year, and "ran" it fairly enthusiastically. She lost her shoe twice, so I guess next year I'll have to get her lace up shoes or something.

And, referring to the title of this post, I also had my fourth annual Mother's Day pictures, and first (and I guess last) pictures as a mother of two. Joe got some good ones, and I was not disappointed.

That was probably the best posed one, in the sense that everyone is looking at the camera. Not great or anything, but me and my kids, on "my" holiday, as requested.

But this was my favorite. I was tickling Ruby and making her laugh and Ramona ran over to get in on the fun.

Giggling babies are the best.

And speaking of the soon-to-be middle child, she is funny and opinionated. She's a handful but also very lovable and sweet. She's an awesome cuddler and she can meltdown like nothing over anything. Every day is an adventure with that kid. She still isn't walking yet, but she's getting close. She has the occasional step every once in a while, but no concentrated intentional walking. It's coming very soon, though. And then no one will be safe. Time to baby proof this new house.

Ol' Ruby Two Teeth

Some Free Time

I've been meaning to write in here (as always) and now I have some more free time. Life has been good. I went through a big funk from the beginning of December through most of January. I don't know why, I just wasn't happy. I can name a lot things that were weighing on me (one very stressful class, the Sandy Hook shooting, exhaustion, and just general malaise) but I have finally started feeling good again.

My classes this semester are much more enjoyable. I have one online and one I actually attend and they are both interesting and require a lot of attention but aren't overwhelming. School is actually a positive thing for me the semester and I'm enjoying it. And, despite what I said when I was in the middle of my drama-fest, I will actually be happy and proud when I graduate. In fact, picturing myself in a graduation gown is pretty much my go-to motivator these days.

Some friends started a weight loss challenge and that has kept me going on my Ruby's pregnancy weight-loss goals. I was having a hard time at it and I finally realized it's because there was no accountability or competitive edge to my efforts. I am so much more productive when there is that aspect involved. (Joe was losing weight after Ramona, which is why I had so much success losing weight after her birth.) I should be back to normal by her birthday and am feeling good about it now.

The girls are really making me smile a lot. Ruby has two teeth now (and the timing on them was spot on-exact to-the-day timing as Ramona if you consider the one week difference in their gestational age versus birth.) She is SO ready to crawl and really REALLY wants to walk. She gets on all fours and rocks, but hasn't actually crawled yet. She gets around through some army crawling and a lot of rolling. It's fun to see her roll around since Ramona didn't really do that (probably because we had so little space when she was this age.) She also started waving recently. I do take pictures of her, but I feel bad because there aren't as many as I took with Ramona. Some of it is just being the second kid, but a big part of it is that I haven't had a point and shoot camera that I really love in awhile. The one Joe got me for Christmas a couple years ago is good outside, but it takes really crappy indoor pictures, which is obviously a majority of what I want to do. So I take most pics with my phone, and they are also really crappy.

Ramona is getting better at having full conversations and thinks of a lot of funny and sometimes clever things to say. For example, potty training has been a big ordeal, and she is pretty much 100% trained in the art of peeing. Pooping is another story, and we are at about 50% there (and that is probably being generous.) So, we were in the car the other day and it was smelly. I wasn't sure if it was her or Ruby, so I asked, "Ramona, did you poop in your pants?" And she responded, "Not yet!" I laughed SO HARD.

Things with Joe are good. We are quite the team these days and are doing lots of saving for a potential house purchase sometime in the hopefully near future. We do have some trips planned for the year just to make life a little more fun (a weekend in Pittsburgh to visit my brother's family and a week up in northern Michigan are in our budget at the moment.) I'd also like to take a weekend trip with just the two of us at some point, but will see how that plays out. We definitely need some time to connect and be grown-ups. (Although, that generally means we need time to be immature together- are we the only ones who mean "be irresponsible" when we say "be grown-ups away from our kids?" I've always assumed that's what most people mean, but maybe I'm wrong.)

Life is good. It's always getting better. I am happily awaiting spring so we can be outdoors and enjoying the fresh air a bit more often. I can't wait to break in the new bicycle trailer for the girls we got for Christmas. There will be picnics at the end of University Trail all summer! That's what I've been thinking about lately.

An Impatient Woman

I have a feeling the next year of my life will feel the longest. There are many things I want to happen that require patience and/or work.

I want a lot of things. I want to be DONE with my Master's degree. It is really killing me. It is so much work and I am pretty permanently unhappy about it. There was a time when I would think, "Oh I'm going to be so proud of myself when I finish! This is a million times harder than my undergrad, what with all the technical work and having kids." Now, I just think, "I want it to be over." I don't think I'll be proud of myself when I'm done, I will just be relieved it's over.

I've thought a lot about cutting down and only taking one class a semester instead of two to make myself less crazy and stressed out. But honestly, the idea of graduating in two years instead of one makes me want to kill myself. I want to be done, and dragging it out another year just doesn't feel like a real option.

We're also working on saving money and raising our credit scores so we can buy a house next year, which is equally unpleasant. I've budgeted us pretty tight until March at least to get the credit cards down to nothing and the savings up higher, so we don't have much fun money.

My job has been kind of frustrating lately. I feel like I need to throw some new energy into it and make it more exciting for myself. Just kind of make things happen instead of wait for them to happen. I need to focus and make it happen.

I feel like I don't get to spend enough time with Ruby. She goes to bed pretty soon after I get home from work. It makes me sad.

I still have 25 pounds of weight to lose from my pregnancy and I just don't have the energy to deal with it.

This post is kind of a bummer, but I've been kind of bummed out lately. Usually if I'm unhappy with my present situation, I'm scheming of a happier future one, but with things as they are right now, a happier future is probably a year away. It's hard to get excited for something that far in the future.

I just want to fast forward. 

I Will Write More Someday. Promise.

School is just REEEEALLY killing me lately. I wake up early, pump milk, go to work, go to lunch, go back to work, pump more milk, work more, come home, make dinner, feed children, put Ruby to bed, do homework, bathe Ramona, do homework, put Ramona to bed, do homework, and go to sleep. Feed Ruby once or twice in the wee hours of the morning in sleep-walk mode. Get up and do it again. So, there is little time for things I actually enjoy in life now. Except seeing my kids be cute, of course.

Ruby is just the sweetest baby in the world. She is so happy to see me. And pretty much anyone, really. She makes eye contact and gets this big goofy toothless grin. I brought up the jumper the other day ago and she LOVES it. She bounces around and spins the toys. She is growing so fast and I feel like I barely get to spend any time with her, which makes me sad.

Ramona turned three and this has been a great time. Turning three was fun. It was the first birthday that she really understood what was going on. Halloween has been the same. She actually gets it which is really fun. We've gone trick or treating twice now. Once at the zoo, and once at our church's trunk or treat. Tomorrow we're trick or treating in Oak Harbor. It should be fun.

I Think About My Husband Too Much

Well, Joe and I have been married for over a year now, which seems weird. It doesn't seem that long ago. I'm still finishing my recaps on weddingbee and I don't feel like an ass about it because it doesn't seem all that long ago. But, we have created another human being in that time, so I guess it should feel different. But adding Ruby to the mix hasn't changed things as drastically as I thought it would. It wasn't half as difficult as I imagined. She fits right in our family in a way that makes it feel funny that she wasn't there before.

Getting married didn't change things either. I mean, it did in a way, but not in a real way. We were already a family, and I don't feel different about that now. I'm still childishly in love with Joe the same way I have been for a long time that feels like my whole life even though I know it isn't. I miss him a lot. I miss him when I'm at work or he's at work. I want to be with him pretty much all the time. I never get tired of him. I do get annoyed by him sometimes. It's not that I never need my space. I just need that space to be adjacent to his space. I enjoy times without him. But the best times are with him. And that is the very childish part of our relationship-the longing to be together. We are messy and silly and spend too much time playing and making each other laugh.

There is a mature part of our relationship as well. We talk about serious things and don't play games with each other's feelings. There's so much trust and little to no jealousy. We want to help each other and support each other and do things we don't really want to in order to make the other's life a little bit happier. We sacrifice and reflect and apologize.

We work together. We are a team.

Is it any wonder that I want to be with him all the time then? It's funny because I don't think anyone knows how great we are together. We aren't one of those couples you look at and think, "Jeez, they are so happy, that is such a perfect couple. I want THAT relationship." But we are so lucky and so happy and it's almost more special that no one gets to see how perfectly we work together. We are like the little cogs of a machine that fit together perfectly. It doesn't seem that miraculous but it kind of is.

This is cheesy and sentimental, but that is what anniversaries are for. If every year of marriage is this simple and beautiful, the rest of our lives will be easy. I doubt it will always be this easy, but you know I'd like to think it will be. It's only the first anniversary; I retain the right to remain optimistic.