Ugh

You have no idea how many posts I start and barely get into for a sentence before I get caught up needing to do something else and then don't finish them. Life has been crazy lately and shows no signs of letting up anytime soon.

In good news, the new baby looks healthy and happy in the womb. No major concerns, it's another girl, so Ramona will get a "baby stitster" which I am pretty excited about. I have been in insane nesting mode, evident by the fact that my house is actually clean on a regular basis, which almost never happens. I've been tackling a lot of projects to get things ready for the baby, and am getting close to done with them even though I'm only 27 weeks pregnant. So, yay for me, I guess.

In annoying news, Joe's union voted to strike today, so sometime in the next couple of weeks we will have no income from him. Hopefully it doesn't last long, but who knows? I also suggest not bleeding a lot in the near future if you live in the Toledo area. I'm not really sure how it will play out, but I guess we just wait and see.

School is really killing me lately. There's so much to do and so little time to do it. Joe works weekends (well, maybe this strike will give me more study time!) and my classes this semester are very involved and require a lot of work. The one is also really manufacturing based, which I don't have a lot of personal experience with, so it makes it harder because I'm learning a lot of the concepts for the first time. Anyway, it's frustrating because it leads to nights like tonight, where I had a thirty minute timed quiz to take, and Ramona decided to throw a tantrum in the middle of it. So I just had to throw her in her crib for a few minutes so I could get the work done and she was screaming the whole time and took off her diaper and peed everywhere. Then I heard her saying "whooooa whoooa whoooa!" and I correctly deduced that she was attempting to climb out of the crib and was going to hurt herself, so I went and grabbed her back out of the crib. So then I had a crying toddler on my lap while attempted to finish the quiz, which I completed, but I did really poorly and the whole thing is annoying and makes me feel like a bad student and a bad mom.

Ramona then told me she loves me and fell asleep. So I'm writing this with a cute little toddler with a still tear-streaked face, who is still not wearing a diaper, snoring on my lap. Can you blame me for looking at blogs of stay-at-home moms with no schoolwork and thinking, "hmm, that must be nice?" It's just been really rough lately. I feel like I'm doing a million things and all of them poorly. I have a B+ in both of my classes right now, which annoys me because I could do better but I just don't have time. Then when I take Ramona out to play, I feel like I'm wasting time that I could be doing school work, but if I do my school work I feel like I'm neglecting her. I've been trying to make sure Joe and I get to talk to one another on occasion, but it's just not as much as would be nice.

So, I think what I really need to do is sit down and plan my time better so that I don't feel guilty about how my time is used. I also need to plan what I'm eating, because I've been eating like crap lately and am going to gain a million pounds this pregnancy if I don't do something about it. And I need to figure out what we're going to do financially to weather out this strike.

But, I did get to go shopping with my mom today and my in-laws took Ramona for part of yesterday, so I got to breathe and chill out for a minute during this week (which was spring break, so I really needed to relax for a minute). I think I'm just freaking myself out because things are so hard right now and we're going to throw a newborn into the mix in a few months. I know we'll make it through and be fine, because things always work out, but it's been really stressful lately. I was handling everything fine until two weeks ago and then it all seemed to fall apart. And I think the problem was that I was able to do everything and ignore myself for a couple of months, but I eventually hit a wall where I needed to take a little time for me, and there was not enough time in my schedule to accommodate that so it all blew up. So, I'm hoping a little planning will help me get it sorted out so everything fits together again.

Work Knows

So, I finally told my boss that I'm pregnant yesterday. I was kind of worried about it, only because I'm due right before year end (aka the worst time an accountant can be out of the office) but I didn't need to worry because my boss was totally awesome. She was so genuinely excited and we were able to discuss a plan for my work to be covered while I'm out. It's been a big relief to get it off my chest, and now that everyone at work knows, it's kind of nice. I've gotten lots of congratulations and can get out of putting another stupid bottle in the water dispenser since I'm pregnant. Now that I don't have to worry about work, I've been able to truly relax and just be happy about the new baby.

Fetey has been a kicking machine. It's hard to remember how much Ramona moved, but it seems like this baby moves even more than she did. It definitely moves a lot more violently. Ramona never managed to wake me up with her fetal movements, and this baby has already done it twice and I'm only 21 weeks along.

Monday is the big ultrasound and I'm both excited and terrified. I can't wait to find out if Fetey is a girl or a boy, but I'm scared they will find something wrong with him/her. I don't know why. I think it's the media attention to Michelle Duggar's late-term miscarriage and the whole Santorum baby-loss thing that freaks me out, because both of things happened around this point of pregnancy. Plus I feel so lucky to have a sweet healthy toddler that I almost feel like I can't be lucky enough to have TWO healthy wonderful children.

Speaking of the child living outside the womb, she is so awesome these days. The more she can talk, the more hilarious things she says. Right now she likes to wear my shoes around the house and sing songs. Her big trick is to climb the cat tower and pretend to get stuck. Then, with a little encouragement from me (a la "You can do it! Keep trying!") she gets down and then when I cheer for her, she says, "Thank you, thank you." We also watch a lot of Sesame Street on youtube. OK Go's Primary Colors, Feist's 1,2,3,4, India Arie and Elmo sing the alphabet, are the favorite Sesame Street jams. She also is really loving Band of Horse's "Out in Nature" via Yo Gabba Gabba! So, she's a little hipster baby that is five years behind on the newest bands for the most part. That must be why she likes the jeggings my sister got her so much.

Snow Day!

We finally got some snow in northwest Ohio (not until mid-January? Highly unusual!) But I enjoyed the mild winter so far, although I was pretty excited about getting snow. Joe and I got Ramona a sled for Christmas, so we were pretty excited to take her out on it. Last year, we pulled her around in a sled one time, but she had yet to do any real downhill sledding. So we got her all bundled up in her snowpants and the whole bit and took her to the hill on the golf course at Ottawa Park. There were quite a few people there, but not so many that it was annoying or overly crowded and kids were running into each other or anything.

At first Ramona had a hard time holding on and kept slipping off. I was cracking up as I took this picture. This is Joe taking her up the hill so they could sled down for the first time. As soon as the hill got to an certain angle she just sort of fell over and laid on the sled.She eventually got the idea and could sit up while getting pulled up the hill (which was much easier than carrying her up it, and she was having a hard time walking with her snowpants and boots and everything.) Joe talked me into going down with her once, so both Ramona and Fetey got to go sledding today.
But I was mostly on photographer duty. I don't think sledding down a not-particularly-steep hill is really too dangerous to while pregnant, but I was worried if we had a wipe out I wouldn't be able to protect both Ramona and my belly at the same time. Plus I almost hit some kid the one time I went down, so I was kind of worried about my inability to steer the sled while holding onto Ramona, which was a problem for both me and Joe.
Those pictures kind of give you an idea of the size of the hill and amount of people there. Like I said, there weren't too many people and it was definitely the "bunny hill" of the area, which was nice because it was mostly families with younger kids. Ramona was the smallest one there, but not by much. The oldest kids were probably eight to ten, and all the kids were young enough that they were there with their parents, which meant none of them were being jerks. And the parents were all helping each other out and asking each others' kids if they were okay if they fell off their sleds and their parents were still at the top of the hill or attending to their siblings or whatever. So, it was really nice. I had fun, and Joe has been talking about sledding since Labor Day, so he definitely had fun. I think Ramona might have had fun, too.

New Year Adventures

So I'm going to play catch up out of chronological order and post about New Year's Day before Christmas. Sorry, but I started looking at these pictures first, so they win.

I started out reading to Ramona and I really like this picture, so I'm making you look at it.

Then we went to go see the Lights Before Christmas at the zoo. (Misleading name, as it was after Christmas.) Ramona was very excited about wearing mittens. "My gwuvs!"
We had an awesome time at the zoo. Last year, we had such a crappy time at the zoo lights, so pretty much anything would have been an improvement. But this year was AMAZING and totally beyond the magic I had imagined. Ramona was so excited about the lights and kept exclaiming, "Look! It's beautiful lights!" and things like, "Daddy! See octopus lights!?" We also rode the carousel and she thought that was great
And I loved the new colored lights they had this year. They looked like they were different sizes, but I think it was an optical illusion caused by the lights being round and black on one side. Here's a picture (on the right), but it doesn't really represent the awesomeness.
Then we went to the museum and got hot chocolate and gingerbread men, as tradition dictates we do.

Ramona was super into the bugs, which are kind of my least favorite part, but Muno from Yo Gabba Gabba has brainwashed her with the "I Like Bugs" song (which she sang as soon as we walked in and she saw a giant millipede.)
We also looked at the fish and did a lot of walking and looking at lights. Good times were had by all. After that, we headed over to Joe's parents house to drop off Ramona and visit for a little bit. Joe and I went back to the house where I insisted on dressing up a little. It's New Year's! I had to wear something sparkly, dammit! And I had some sparkly tights, so, there ya go. Then I made Joe take pictures because I don't dress up very often, and it's nice to have a picture of me not looking like crap every once in awhile.
Just because I don't look like crap, doesn't mean I can't look ridiculous! After that, we went to Nick & Jimmy's in Temperance and got a snack. Then, we picked up Tauno and headed to the Knotty Pine for midnight. They had free hats, horn blower things (what are those called?), and champagne at midnight. I drank water all night as both DD and a pregnant lady, but I did have a splash of champagne at midnight. After the big moment, we headed back to Joe's parents' house to pick up the Fish. I was expecting her to be passed out, but she was partying in her jammies still. Apparently, she stayed up and did the countdown at midnight and yelled "Happy New Year!" That kid, I tell ya.

Anyway, then we headed back to our house. I had been texting with Nina throughout the night and she said to stop by if we felt like it. Honestly, I expected Ramona to fall asleep before we got back to the house, but she was not only still awake, but kept yelling at Tauno to wake up. So, I figured we could swing by Nina's on the way home since she's only a few blocks away.

I was kind of hoping she would be happy to see me, since I was bringing an unexpected toddler and "getting pretty sloppy" Tauno. Luckily, it seems that I didn't ruin the night. Yay! We hung out for maybe an hour and then headed home. Ramona finally crashed at 2am with me. Tauno and Joe stayed up drinking and watching TV, and I have no idea when they finally passed out.

I have to say, it was a pretty kickass start to 2012. And as far as 2012 goes, we already have two awesome weddings to look forward to, not to mention the fact that we will have another baby. I have a great feeling about this year. I hope I'm right!

Lazy

There is so much to write about with all the holidays having passed, but I've been being lazy. Tonight Ramona is actually taking a nap, so I have time to kill, so I figured I'd throw a quick update here. Today was another pregnancy appointment. The midwife says everything is looking good and I set up my anatomy scan ultrasound for February 6. With any luck, we'll find out if Fetey is male or female then. (I started calling the fetus Fetey. What do you think?) Anyway, I started feeling its movements in the last couple weeks, so that is always fun. I'm 17 weeks and still not really showing, although I certainly feel bigger and my pants are getting tighter.

Ramona doesn't really understand that she will have a little sibling soon, but it's a pretty theoretical for someone her age, so I'm not too surprised. Honestly, it's hard for me to believe that we'll have a new baby here soon. I've been so hung up on thinking about all the crappy parts of having a baby that I haven't really let myself focus on the fun parts at all. But today at the doctor's office, I was in the examination room across the hall from the UTMC Babies board, (you know, that bulletin board full of pictures of babies delivered by the practice that every OB office has) and I suddenly remembered how cute babies are and how fun and exciting they can be. So I have been kind of floating around in baby excitement most of today, which has been nice.

I want to post about Christmas and New Year's, but I want to post pictures, which means I have to get the cameras up and running. So, maybe tonight, maybe not. The quick version is they were fun and we were happy.

Meeting the Midwife

So, my doctor's office has a midwife who does all the maternity care. My first appointment, I just met with the nurse practitioner who usually does my gyno type stuff (pap smears, check ups, prescriptions). Today was my first appointment meeting the midwife.

She was really nice, which was a relief. I was not a huge fan of the doctor I had with Ramona, but I didn't have much of a choice because he was pretty much the only doctor in a 90 mile radius of our little shack in the desert. But this time, it seems like I have someone nice who is on my side. We talked about a lot of stuff, but I didn't get too much into the detail of how the actual birth process will take place (mostly because I still have awhile before I have to worry about that.) My next appointment is early January, and my next ultrasound will be at 22 weeks. Hopefully we will find out if we are expecting another mini-Meggie or our first junior Joe at that time.

The idea of having two kids is pretty crazy. We were playing with Ramona tonight, and I mentioned that next Christmas we'll have two kids. Joe gave me a weird look. I guess it is pretty hard to imagine it at this time. It seems like a lot of people are worried about their capacity to love more than one child when they're pregnant with their second. I'm not worried about that at all. I mean, I love Ramona more than anyone else in the world, and I love Joe more than anyone else in the world, and I love my mom more than anyone else in the world. You know what I mean? I have a lot of love for a lot of people, so I'm not worried that my love is a finite source that is running low. I do have worries, though.

My biggest worry is being a good mom with two kids. Well, not even a good mom, just not a crappy mom. I know all around I won't be a crappy mom, but I'm pretty sure I will be for the first few months at least. See, for the most part, I'm a pretty patient and loving mom. I don't yell a lot; I remain calm for the most part. But the one time I am pretty much guaranteed to be crazy and angry is when I am sleep deprived. When Ramona wakes up in the middle of the night and starts whining, I have been known to yell, "JUST SLEEP! Go to sleep!" (*Note*- this is a very ineffective technique to get your child to sleep.) I just lose it. And when Ramona was a newborn, I'm pretty sure I was half crazy the entire time because I barely slept. I'm positive I will be half crazy with this baby as well, unless it sleeps through the night starting the day it is born. And that's ok, I knew I was signing up for that when I decided to have another kid. But I just don't know how I'm going to function as that half crazy lady while also being a decent parent to a toddler.

So far, that's my biggest concern about being a mom of two. I'm sure I'll come up with other worries as time goes on.

Oh, and cute side story that is totally unrelated to anything else- today Joe asked Ramona whether she wanted a baby brother or a baby sister. She said, "A baby stitster! And popcorn."

New Baby

Kathleen said it looked looked like the dude in the wheelchair from Nightmare before Christmas, and I can't really argue with that. I do like that you can see the legs in this one, though. The baby chilled all stretched out like this most of the time, as if my uterus is a sweet hammock.
Here's a less creepy looking face, although it's still not quite right.
Ok, so this one shows the baby looking like a baby. The cool thing with this baby is that my placenta is visible during the ultrasound. (It's on the bottom front.) With Ramona, I never saw placenta on an ultrasound.
There's a little hand, from when the baby was trying to high five me. Then, it did sign language to indicate I should eat more ice cream. I must listen.
And here's a nice profile shot to prove that the baby is not a Tim Burton creature.

They said everything looks great and it was a lot of fun to finally see that there is something going on in there! Next week I will officially be in the second trimester.

Ramona's reaction to the pictures was to smear her peanut butter covered hands on them and announce "Peanut butter jelly jelly sandiwich!"